Trick or Treat!!

Yesterday was halloween, it was a fun day. We went to the party at the YMCA and then trick or treating in a neighborhood close by. We wanted to go in our subdivision, but it was pretty dark.. I guess no one wanted to hand out candy here. Ah well, we got lots of candy anyway! Friday night we went to a hallween party at our friend BR's house. It was alot of fun. Everyone dressed up and the kids had a load of fun. While I was there, a girl that I hadn't met yet asked me which kids were mine and if they were the only ones. That question always throws me a little off. Because there are somedays when I will say no, they have a baby brother.. or something like that, but that leads to questions, which are fine with me, but at certain times I don't want to dampen anyone's mood. I mean, no one at a party wants to get all sad by hearing about things such as babies that live in heaven! They are supposed to be having a good time, right? But then again, I don't want to NOT have him acknowledged. He is my son, he is their brother. Just because he isn't physically here, doesn't make him any less part of our family. Those times when I just don't want the questions I quickly change the subject, hopefully the other person doesn't see it as rude. I do answer the question before I change the subject, but I don't leave time for more questions. The other thing, I can't STAND when people talk about how many boys vs. girls I have and they leave J out of that equation. Most times I will correct them on how many boys I do actually have, but it's so annoying! It would be different if it were a stranger or someone that didn't know about J, but when it is friends or acquaintances they know better. I guess maybe it is weird for them to count J, since he isn't actually here? Who knows.

Today they had a thing called "Holiday Market" at the colliseum, it was alright, but I expected more. While we were there browsing, there were quite a few different items that were personalized with names on them. I constantly find myself looking for things that say J's name on them. Or anything that could tie into him. I didn't look for personalized things for the other kids, just J. I don't do it on purpose, I guess it's just one of those things that special mommies like me do? Surely I couldn't be the only one!

Here I am jumping around again, but I wonder what we would have dressed J up to be for halloween this year? Maybe a little spiderman to match his big brother? Or maybe just a spider?? lol How cute. See, this is one of those things that I wanted to be able to do.. dress them alike, not only for everyday clothing, but halloween!!! Have 2 little spidermans or batmans. I mean you can only do that for so long until they can decide, right? So I wish I were doing it now. DS was actually the "bad" spiderman, maybe J could have been the "good" spiderman! lol Ahhhh I want to see it so bad. I bought a wagon the other day, specifically to make trick or treating easier. When do babies start sitting? Would J be sitting well enough to sit in the wagon with his brother or would I be struggling trying to figure out a better way? I do SO MUCH of this wondering. I assume that I always will. It's ok with me. Like I said in the previous blog, I love the wondering about him.